Tbh, lately my mood has been really shitty af. when i looked at myself in the mirror, I felt like I don't know who I am anymore. I miss the old me. the bubbly Kuza in highschool that doesn't give a shit about anything and just live life as fun as it could be. The older I get, the worst my thinking process gets and it suck. I tend to over think alot these days and gosh it is badly affecting my life. The smile in that picture hides a thousand untold feelings. I wish feelings doesn't exist, I wish depression doesn't exist, I wish I could feel like I'm good enough, I wish I could just ran away right now. no notices and no warning. just get a fucking passport, pack my bags and leave. literally. I feel mentally tired and I don't know how to stop this anxious and anxiety for keep messing up my life. It is 3am now and I can't sleep. Even after this post is done and I'll lie on my bed, I still can't sleep. I only sleep when I'm really tired and I still have 2 more exam papers left for this semester then it is semester break, finally! I'll try to travel as much as I can this semester. really don't want to stay at home that much this time. sangat serabut okay.
"Don't worry about me,
I'll be okay soon,
At least that's what
I try to convinced myself
and people around
to think that
I like to deal with my problems
alone.
People say
tomorrow will be better,
but tomorrow never comes
and come tomorrow,
I'll still be waiting
for another tomorrow,
so my problems can get better.
Don't worry about me,
I'll be okay soon,
Tomorrow will be better
and I'm just waiting for tomorrow to come."
- "And I'll keep on waiting because nobody sees the truth in my lies" by R.L
